Jody Lynn Nye Theme Music Man

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that meant someone had called for help. He leveled his S&W pistol at the man
behind the counter and backed away toward the middle of the lobby.
"You get that money into those bags, pronto. Nobody comes in or goes out until
we're clear." To add weight to his orders, he pulled back the trigger with one
grimy thumb. The teller nodded uneasily.
Dirtbag signaled with the gun for his fellows to collect the sacks the tellers
handed over.
One of Irwin's fellow hostages, a burly man in construction worker's clothes,
started forward, fists ready. Dirtbag spun to cover him with the S&W. The man
held up his hands, and returned meekly to his place.
"Nobody moves," the villain said. He glanced to one side, where a
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Jody Lynn Nye - Theme Music Man mother was shielding her young daughter with
her own body.
Dirtbag reached around her and yanked the girl toward him. He put the gun
barrel to the child's temple. "Or she winds up dead."
"You creep!" Irwin shouted. He leaped for the gunman, hands out for the man's
throat. Dirtbag, surprised, raised the gun to blast at him, and then dropped
it to cover his ears.
Deafening blares of trumpet music filled the room. Rolling thunder from kettle
drums echoed off the walls, making the windows shake, and the desks danced on
the marble floors. Music burst out of
Theme Music Man louder than it had ever done for anyone else, disabling the
crooks. He closed with Dirtbag, and chopped him with a quick left to the
belly, and a roundhouse right to the jaw. The girl fell on the floor and
crawled back, sobbing, to her mother.
As if the music had awakened them from somnambulance, the bank guards dropped
their hands and waded into the fray beside Theme
Music Man.
Dirtbag threw his arms around Irwin and squeezed. Irwin knew this move from
Dirtbag's rap sheet: the perp was trying to use his incredible stink to
disable him. Irwin concentrated on the helpless crowd around him. The brass
band got louder, and louder, until he could almost sense Dirtbag's fillings
rattle in his teeth. The villain let go, and Irwin clasped both hands
together. With speed and grace that would have made Kickfighter proud, Theme
Music Man spun in a circle, and connected with the side of Dirtbag's head. The
robber dropped like a stone.
After one final, glorious crescendo, the music died away to a tweetie when the
police arrived. By then, all of the robbers had been
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Jody Lynn Nye - Theme Music Man rounded up and were being held at gunpoint by
the guards in a corner. Dirtbag and his men, heads still ringing, were taken
into custody.
The chief of police himself congratulated Irwin personally for the television
cameras.
"That was one daring move, Theme Music Man," Chief Hasselrich said,
pronouncing the name carefully for the benefit of the viewers who didn't
recognize the middle-sized man in blue jeans and zipper jacket.
"I couldn't have done anything else," Irwin said truthfully. In more ways than
one. He didn't have a supersuit to protect him, or muscles from another
planet, or the pharmacopoeia of a mad scientist to use against villains. It
was just him, against a creep who would use threats against a little girl. "In
fact, I didn't realize I was making music until it was all over."
"That was some music," one of the guards put in.
"But what were you doing here, Mr. Theme Music Man?" a reporter asked, pushing
a microphone under his nose.
"Well, I came in to talk to them about a loan," Irwin said, "but they& "
"& We're always happy to do business with such a virtuous upholder of the
law," Gruber said, shoving himself in front of the television cameras and
microphones. "Mr, Katzenbaum was about to sign the papers when that gang tried
to rob us. We were very lucky he was here." He put a firm arm around Irwin's
shoulders, and gave him a big smile. Irwin wasn't about to blurt out the
truth. He
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Jody Lynn Nye - Theme Music Man was going to get his loan, and that was all
that mattered. Gruber wouldn't dare to back away on his approval now, not
after having announced it on television.
"You realize there's a reward for Dirtbag's capture," the police chief said.
"You've earned it, Theme Music Man."
"Thank you, Chief," Irwin said formally. They shook hands, and the crews
switched off their lights and rolled up their sound cables. A
reporter leaned in quickly with a big still camera and snapped off a flashbulb
in their faces.
"Page one tomorrow, Mr. Theme Music Man, Chief!"
"Wow," said Irwin. Still dazed, he went back to Gruber's desk to sign his
papers, and wandered out onto the street to catch a bus back to work.
He'd never done that before, foiled a crime all by himself. Since the
beginning of his supercareer, Irwin had always been a sidekick. He, skinny
Irwin Katzenbaum, whose only talent was being the world's only bipedal
jukebox, had helped to capture a dangerous criminal and his gang!
He bounced down the street with a springy step as he remembered just exactly
how it felt to kayo Dirtbag, to save the little girl boy, he was scared! He
wondered if all the heroes felt that way when they did their superdeeds.
The symphony rose around him again, filling the street with the bassoons and
bass horns. The kettle drums rolled, and he conducted an invisible orchestra
with his elbows akimbo. Never had he evoked such incredible music, and it was
all for him!
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Jody Lynn Nye - Theme Music Man
An old woman strode up to him and thwocked him across the shins with her
umbrella.
"Young man!" she shrieked, shaking the handle in his face. "Stop making all
that noise!"
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Irwin gawked at her. In an instant, the fanfare died away. The mouse and its
kazoo were back, but it didn't bother Theme Music
Man. He was happy.
He walked away humming.
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